Questions Questions..

There is a road I want to travel,
but I don't know where it leads to,
I wish it takes me to my dreamland,
where I am the master of my own fate,
or maybe it just pulls me out,
of this misery that I wish to abate.

There are few words I wish to speak,
but I don't know what they are,
maybe they express my sorrow, or maybe a guilt,
or maybe they just speak of a life,
that I have never really managed to live.

There is something I wish to ask someone,
but I am scared to know if that someone even exists anymore,
what if he is buried under the sands of time,
with only a few prints of his presence left behind?
and what if those prints never fade away,
leaving me in a state where I am neither here, nor there to stay?

There is something I wish to ask someone,
but I am scared to know what I want to ask,
what if my question raises a thousand questions back in my face?
what if the answers to those questions were never ever meant to be?
Or, what if I just end up asking what I want to
And end up knowing all the answers,
would I be too sad after that?
Or would I have a content heart forever after that?

There are few faces I want to bring a smile on,
lest I know how to smile myself,
what if those faces don't know me anymore?
would I still be yearning to see them happy?
or would I just care no more?

There are few thoughts left to be penned,
few words left to be scribbled,
few lines yet to finish,
few pages yet to be flipped,
but what if those books are dust laden now?
what if those pages have already been torn?
what if those words have long been forgotten?
and those thoughts don't matter anymore?

There are so many questions with answers to none,
there are so many actions with a purpose to none,
there are so many expressions with meanings to none,
so many lives I have already lead, but sadly, with a soul to none.

Should I just carry on, hoping for some miracle to conjure?
should I just stroll along, hoping for the path to unfold itself?
Or should I simply give up - shattered and perished,
and learn to live without a heart, that I once cherished?

The unknown

In the midst of a commotion,
I wander aimlessly,
thinking about my life,
a life, so unknown.

There is noise all around,
of yelling and screeching,
it reaches my ears,
but never seems to reach within.

There are people I meet,
with some business of sorts,
but none seem to bother,
they all feel so alien.

I am lost in a monotony,
of a schedule that now rules me,
some bits and pieces of my life,
just stick together but still make no sense.

The colors soon disappear,
and the smiles become so scarce,
even the sunshine seems to trouble me,
even a gentle breeze causes unrest.

The rains have ceased to come,
and the lakes have dried till the last drop,
I can now see the stone face beneath the calm waters,
it looks as dead, as it has forever been.

The soft pebbles have turned into pricking stones,
a smooth walk has now become a faltering run,
I can see my pug marks laid along this path,
but they were red with my blood, not brown anymore.

My flesh feels so depleted,
and bones so unused,
there is no sense of direction,
that I wish to pursue.

I am living a few slices of time,
I am flowing with a stream of breath,
there is no want left to be wanted,
there is no pride that I will ever know.

What a wonderful life

The sky is blue, the clouds are white,
the sun is shining, its so bright.
Man! what a wonderful life...

I see a stranger, he smiled to me,
i don't know what it meant, but I could feel the glee.
Man! what a wonderful life...

My dream came true, though with a fight,
I have a house, still unreal to my sight.
Man! what a wonderful life...

The people I adore, the people I care,
are all close to me, like they've always been there.
Man! what a wonderful life...

The girl I love, loves me the most,
she's so far yet, she stays so close.
Man! what a wonderful life...

No more I think what I lost, no more I think what I could have been,
what I have is what I treasure, and the rest is left , for Fate, to be.
Man! what a wonderful life...

The night is so tranquil, the day brings new vigor,
I sleep with a content, and I wake up with new hunger.
Man! what a wonderful life...

I learned from a man, about things un-thought before,
I could see past the winds of delusion, I felt like I reached ashore.
Man! what a wonderful life...

Theres no "I" masked with an ego anymore, neither a semblance of "Me",
I think I have suppressed the Identity, which was never really meant to be.
Man! what a wonderful life...

A life I trembled through, but now, a walk un-faltered,
A life I captured maybe, to be free of rebirth.
Man! what a wonderful life...it was

Words

words, so less in quantity.
words, so scant to sight.
words, spoken so rear.
words, spoken never.
But,
words, spoken at will.
words, spoken from heart.
words, to tell i love you.
words, to show i care.

To be..

To be born, unshackled.
To see, unsullied.
To hear, unsaid.
To utter, unsaid.
To feel, unperturbed.
To do, unacted.
To laugh, uncontrolled.
To learn, unprejudiced.
To love, unfathomable.
To earn, ungettable.
To give, unthinkable.
To walk, unaided, yet,
To live, unconquered.
To die, unforgotten,
is a life that I imagined...

I am a star

I have spent years seeing people live,
I have spent years seeing people die.

You look at me and say, "How beautiful bright it is!",
You look at me and say, "wish I could be that bright too".

I live so far, that my existence for you, barely lies,
yet I live so near, to shine right in your eyes.

You can look at me as a ball which emits just rays of light,
You can look at me as a god which shows a hope to your sight.

I have lived long enough to surpass all mortality,
yet it takes just a pinch of kindness, to fathom my immortality.

Don't spend all your life just gazing at me,
just live for your dreams and one day you will indeed become me.

A morning's tale

Its early morning, pitch dark,
When the first ray of sun shines with a gleaming spark.

The very first bird, chirping so clear,
Like it is trying to pull me, near and near.

The very first drop of dew is reflecting the light,
Waving gently on its leaf, and yet placed so tight.

The very first wave of wind is brushing through my skin,
Like its bringing with it, the memory of someone akin.

The very first blooming flower is smelling so fragrant,
Its tossing with the breeze dancing all vagrant.

The very first thought now strikes through my mind,
Of none than that of a friend, who was always so kind.

A friend so simple, a friend so true,
A friend so real, a friend almost untrue.

A friend in merry, a friend in hay,
A friend in sorrow, a friend in dismay.

A friend, i feel, is a lot like me,
Yet a friend who is more happy, maybe, unlike me.

The smile on that face, the twinkle in those eyes,
Tells me they are true, without any lies.

The care in that heart, for a mortal soul like me,
Just feels so warm, and yet feels so free.

No threads to bound me, into gnarling twists of fate,
No questions to be answered, no storm to abate.

Its a notion of a friend, a memory restored,
Its a notion of a friend, like a blessing bestowed.

It was a thought to preserve, it was a morning to remember,
A friend to befriend, forever and forever.

Night

It is the story of a night,
a night full of bliss,
a night so serene,
a night never to be missed.

The first souvenir of that night,
that was gifted to my mind,
was a whooping, white pumpkin,
mottled, but with a halcyon shine.

The moon shone from the clouds,
and I could see my skin much brighter,
as it spread its silver across the field,
my heart felt so much lighter.

The winds were so still,
they bore the spirit of silence,
no stir through their waves,
they were flowing with no pretence.

There was a leaf holding a drop of water,
which curled the silver on its crystal face,
it looked so clear, I could see my eyes in it,
a thousand dreams brimming, right on its surface.

I could hear the silence speak,
words of glory in my ears,
But it also spoke of the times unknown,
that I had spent in the yesteryears.

Those times felt soulless,
and the winds felt untouched,
there was no trace of any senses,
as I felt unclutched.

It was a night of few earthly hours,
a few moments of freedom from despair,
and as it passed with the first rays of dawn,
I felt like I was now sitting elsewhere.

Others

I look upon others as somebody,
somebody who's outside my realm,
somebody who doesn't bother me anymore,
who may speak a million things next to me,
and yet I fell they are just miles away.

sometimes I feel this frustration within,
a feeling where you want to push everyone away,
a feeling where you want to snap at whatever they say,
a feeling to just run away.
And then I get this feeling,
to just hold back myself,
make myself invulnerable to others,
And this is what keeps me going.

Now suddenly I have these few others,
who don't seem so distant,
I find these others close to me,
they are not like me and yet they are not unlike either,
they bring to me this aura.
I guess these are those others I was searching for,
some found me and some I hit upon.

So long, never

It hasn't been so long,
that i cant write a song,
for a pretty girl,
who, one day, just came along.

It was the first day of my college,
and i was walking through a lane,
with people unknown all around me,
and things of which i had no prior knowledge.

Then one day in my class,
just right across my bench,
I saw this cute little face,
who seemed, just like me, a little out of place.

Then days went by just sitting behind her,
and lectures passed thinking idly about her,
at once I thought, "Today, let me speak",
but it always ended in me being just silent and meek!

She always stared at me, 
in our graphics class,
and I thought to myself,
"Man! even I've got some class".

A few more months just gently passed,
and then I started speaking to her, at last!
but my tongue still crumbled, and mind became numb,
each time after I spoke to her, I thought, "shit! I was so dumb".

It was  only a matter of time,
that even she felt that tiny little dime,
tossing up and down in her stomach,
making it into a sweet chime.

I told her that i like her,
she  said, "I like you too"
She told me that she loves me,
and i told her, "I love you too"

We started  going out every day,
immediately after the college.
She would be "in the canteen"
and i would be "studying for GRE"

It never felt so good before,
with her thoughts all over my geeky brain,
and every single part of me,
would feel like its been born again.

Then I lived the best days of my life,
and the best winds, as if they would sing a song,
I saw the best stars shining at night, with her,
And strolled in the best rains, holding her hands all along.

Then came a time, when I was to depart,
every day after that, I lived with a heavy heart,
the days werent any good, and the winds werent gentle either,
the stars had stopped shining, and the rains had started to bother.

This was a new face of Life,
who was telling me about things beyond her.
These were some new moments of Time,
who wanted me to be away from her.

I agreed to Life, I  saw things beyond her,
I agreed to Time, I lived moments without her.
But even now as I look back, along the path I conquered,
I find my heart lying there, still beating for noone but her.

I dont eat alone, shes always eating with me,
I dont walk alone, shes always walking with me,
As much as I feel distant,
I still, never live alone, shes always living right inside me.

The days and winds, and starts and rains,
dont seem like a friend anymore,
Life and Time have shown me their might,
And now I feel like crossing the sea and coming back ashore.

I know shes waiting right there,
waiting to hold me all tight.
I know I will run to her and kiss her head,
Good Lord, now that would be some sight!

What more do I tell her,
What more do I tell myself,
For all that I know all my life,
is only one thing, that....

It will never be so long,
that I cant write a song,
for a pretty girl,
who, one day, just came along.